Thoughts on Christmas Vaction (by James)
Bugs Bunny's Howl-O-Ween (by James)
How to eat: Sugar (by Al)
Nantucket Trip (by James)
How to eat: Eggo Waffles (by Al)
The Tragedy of the G train — Graffiti
Halloween at the McWilliamses — blurb
the Village Pizza Calzone — Tour
Gullah Gullah Puzzle, Short Film
Made this for a contest. Im sure it will win.
Everyone needs a quarantine project. Mine was a thing I call Skynet Simulator
In the totality of 2009 one update has been completed and it's by James. Thanks so much James because you made this year. Its ok though I swear something is just around the corner. Here is an Alpha.
James, you inspire me. I was so inspired by you I decided to write about 68 pieces of spoiled food. This was so stupid. And just for some additional useless stats:
Mold: 13
Garbage: 8
Waste: 14
Hate: 7
Rot: 11
James Article is up. To everyone that thinks this site is dead- I want you to all to know that it is more alive than ever in fact. Everything has just been renewed for 2 more article-filled years. Soo many articles.
New shit. Of food & electronics. And what shit it is..
A new garbage article.
Like my philisophy has always been... dirt sells.
So enjoy the crappy dirt.
Another year another al-made article.
Category: Sugar.
For christmas this year my gift is keeping uglypersonsface alive for another unknown amount of months. With another dirty tour.
Standard run-of-the-mill article.
And dont you dare think that the Gullah is over. 7 more fun filled days till to be delievered right on time for x-mas. Just you wait.
Being a webmaster is easy with other people doing the
annoying chores for me.
Tons more coming 'soon' !!!!!!!!111!!11!!!!!one!!
I wonder why all the regulars have stopped visiting the site.
Its because I stopped generating new conent, isnt it.
Obvisously we need more Gullah Gullah island jokes.
Article. By someone not me. Brother Al.
Thats right!! Uglypersonsface.com is accepting all articles from anyone. So give em here and up they will go for the legions.
Still not dead yet... In fact its never been more alive on its brand new server.
Things are on the way. I swear.
Ajax'd out xmas & added another hilarious, hilarious day.
Best thing about this joke is that it never gets old.
Sabbatical is over and its time for more... Gullah...
Its going to be a long winter.
Day 2.
Yes we are going to go through all 12 days.
As long as it takes.
Gullah is back.
I know you've missed it, but not as much as I.
Watch the crap start to flow.
G article. Pretentious, artsy, ambitious, and gay. Just like this city, doncha know.
Also graffiti.
Hey look: a holiday special finished before the holiday. Whoo.
A guest article, featuring cousin Ryan from RyanBags.
Did you know I don't have legions of fans demanding to have articles made about them? I bet you guessed. Im watching the sunrise right now. Its sick and gross.
Goodnight.
And old adventure I had lying in the archives of my harddrives. Featured now as a crazy 3-parter. Also an old tour. Ta.
Article. More to come. Check back later.
Also who would've thought there were two different spellings of omelette/omelet? Kind of like grey/gray. I use them both.
Added logo arrows. Click for random.
Also made a bunch more so you all are obligated to use it.
Article time. And a fun little tour. Both of which detailing the wonderous place known as Village Pizza.
...oh yeah, I'm living in Brooklyn now. So I'm not sure what will happen, but I CAN promise more of our favorite family, the Gullah Gullahs.
Due to frenzied public decmand, a fun Gullah Gullah puzzle.
Bonus short film included.
New 'article' right on time. Don't let anyone say Ed breaks his promises.
Also added fancy-smancy Nav bar to every page. Which required the entire conversion to PHP and many many bugs.
Next step: new layout.
Ill give you animals one next week I promise. Meanwhile... updated this and that... fixed typos.... appropriatly renamed Hate Mail to Fan Mail... crapped away Zork... all the boring stuff
Why does this crappy layout give me a headache? white text on black bg. weak.
new article. kind of amusing, mostly gross.
Oh and that beta everyone is raving about... it will be done. Before May 11 at least.
More code to make a new game.
Only a beta... but the hardest part is done. So maybe it will expand into the rest of the apartment.
Yeah spring break.
Uglypersonsface celebrates Spring Break by having the Quiz stats dymanic.
At some point we broke 100. I've stopped caring about 'fake' responses.
So fill it out if you havent. It's totally worth it.
Expect more this week.
It's up, the Gullah Gullah episode to download. in hosted 30 meg goodness wmv.. or avi torrent.
Now you will see, I'm not making this up.
Included: the original face. The very first.
Just when you think the site is dead, pow. Boom. I go and do something like this. An insane sprawling article about the island of Gullah Gullah.
I have no idea if anyone will find this funny. No idea.
Yeah it's been too long with no article. I'm making one right now. I'm on it.
Reason for posting: I'm not sure if I should be proud of this or just sad, but they are selling the old 415 house for $1. It's a sweet deal, if you ask me. Article calls it 'a fixer-upper's fixer-upper'.
http://www.madison.com/tct/news/index.php?ntid=71618
New article. Or really just a bunch of crappy articles in a pile.
Oh yeah and I finally finished the candybar tourny.
New section: Hate mail.
And yes I know there are popups all of a sudden. It's cause of that lame ass Cbox thing. Sons of bitches.
I'll make my own... bigger faster.. stronger...
This is a big day. Look at the address bar. What is that you see? None of this this 'mywebspace' bullshit? none of this 'unsecured' clicking? We can all thank Jelani from www.zeromercy.com for this, because this site is now being hosted on what would be the futon of his remote server.
Thank you Jelani.
Oh and I changed the Wendy's article so it doesn't look like garbage.
The candy thing starts.
sooooo much candy
Its a new article. A biggin. About pennies. And such.
415 Horror Show, featuring... navigation bar v1.0
Made schedule for candy bar thingy.
A couple changes with main page.
Expect more this week,
or dont and be suprised
Remember that Personality Quiz thing? You were pretty sore at the end I bet... well sore no more because I told you I learned PHP and I have the results.
Removed any 'fake' responses , where all answers were A,A,A,A.etc.
It's not dynamic, no. Don't worry I'll get it to that point.. one day...
Also I clarified some of the rules of the Candybar Tournament and made it more 'attractive'.
So I decided to php instead of reading Plato.
This might be fun kinda. I make a candy bar tournament.
So you make a bracket.
Deal.
Jemima article.
So apparently people are hating on the 415 game. I'll hide it away with the rest of those 415 flash games I've made one of these days.
And no, we still don't have internet. We've narrowed the incompetance down to a single person. Jill, the representative to Steve Fucking Brown. She loves her power. Loves it.
Also more links. Good links.
Best part of being a webmaster:
if I don't feel like writing anything,
I sure don't have to.
For people that didn't know, I moved across town. 415 is no more, which is why there is no splashy splash page.
Maybe I'll add a section later that has all the unfinished articles I did.
For now, I added the first level to the 'Escape from 415' game.
Yes it's the first 'real' flash game I ever made.
No I didn't make it easy.
Oh yeah, I haven't learned the loading page yet so be patient.
Added a links page. With all of my glorious links.
And another crap game. Not suitable for the general public.
At all.
But here it is.
And then I suddenly learned PHP. And then I made a quiz.
I think you all will be quite satisfied.
So I've been working with flash....
This is for you people who check this news section:
415 Quiz
Patience is one of many keys to happiness.
Just to prove I'm not just wasting my time away I'll toss you
animals a bone: The demo to the 415 Game.
When you get to 50 something happens.
Yes I do know it is a buggy resource hog.
Gameplay will come later.
Not as much an article but but an adventure.
Involving the 2nd of July.
In other news, our house is currently plagued by flies.
Changed the layout. No more crappy scroll bars where we
don't need them.
Also ordered the articles newest → oldest
I haven't been slacking as much as one would think though.
Just a few more dayz.
I'll bet your collective thighs are quivering with anticipation.
New layout. The x-axis scroll bar is bothering way too much.
Ill fix it later.
Added crappy 'cbox' thingy to main page.
Swear all you want noone minds.
Dave article finished.
Hopefully it will make up for that Life thing.
More to come.
'Soonish'...
new article. noone knows if it's good
check back in a week or so
Yes it's been a while. I'm real sorry.
In other news, not so much a true article but a preview.
Free autograph to the first one that finds the easter egg.
Also, don't stop follwing the site.
Or if you do stop, check back in a month or so because
I will be bored enough to update again very shortly.
Also I promise this main page will be fixed very soon.
With a splash of luck.
Update. Easter special.
I don't care if it is 10 days after the fact. If you dont like it,
leave and never come back.
The vote is over. http://www.uglypersonsface.com won
(kind of) so I declare it the winner. I'm not paying a dime for
no server space however, so we get to keep clicking yes
to showing unsecured items.
Also update on splash page pics,
and new Gumbo article for you ungrateful bastards.
I even did a goddamn spell check.
It's a new week, and a new article.
Plus I went back and fixed all the shittiness of the other pages.
ALSO it's almost inevitable I will get a domain name,
and what fun if I let a vote decide the name!
Maybe I won't have to manually give myself hundreds
of votes in order to look cool this time.
Plus you can add comments, and if any suggestions are cool
enough I will add them to the list.
Well I fixed the problem on the tour... so it's less annoying.
You can all thank me later.
So the problem with the unsecured items is annoying I know...
but sooner or later I'll have a domain name, which will fix it,
....hopefully.
Also the tour is updated.
New article "tour" up, and same with this news feature.
I can't promise anything on this webpage,
but I know I can update ever week....
...or so.
And is you don't think this page is very good...
ESAD.
(eat shit and die)
By the way, it has been notified to me that this site
is annoying to view in Microsoft's internet exploder...
something about secure and unsecure items.
...well if you haven't switched to firefox yet
you deserve to be annoyed. So enjoy.
If you have to use it though....
...I recommend the left hand on the enter button.
One day lad... this will allll be CSS.
But not today.
