1) Sex: 2) Do you close the bathroom door if you are alone in a house? 3) How about if you are not alone? 4) Do you stand or lean to one side when you wipe? 5) Do you mentally remember everything your hands have touched since you last washed them? 6) Have you ever been arrested? 7) Could you be in jail right now for the illegal things you've done? 8) The figure below that I like least is: A: B: C:
9) Presented with and I like the following the most: A: B: C:
10) Does the phrase "And now for something completely different." mean anything to you? 11) How about the phrase "Apes are monkeys too" 12) Or "..Making your dreams come true, for you. Making your dreams come true" 13) Have you ever been the first to show up to a party? 14) How about the last to leave? 15) Do you golf? 16) Do you disc golf? 17) Have you ever given blood? 18) Are you an organ donor? 19) Would you consider donating your body to science? 20) Are you a vegetarian? 21) Are you a vegan? 22) Have you ever tried being either? 23) Do you download music illegally? 24) Do you download applications illegally? 25) Are you currently downloading anything illegally? 26) Have you ever shoplifted? 27) How about anything over like 10$? 28) Would you spank your child? 29) Would you shake them? 30) What is worse: being labeled as liberal or conservative? 31) Would you vote for Arnold if given the chance? 32) Did you vote in 04? 33) Do you know what the term "Political Flamewar" means? 34) Do you watch TV news? 35) Do you watch MTV? 36) Do you pretty much gag at anything on TV? 37) How about Iron Chef? 38) Do you remember when you learned the truth about Santa? 39) Have you ever been the one that told anyone the truth about Santa? 40) So what's the deal with Bush?
A: God appointed him. B: He is one of our greatest presidents ever. C: I don't totally agree with him, but he sure as hell is better than anyone the Democrats have coughed out. D: He think what he is doing is good for this country, really he does. Still a dumbass. E: I think he's just a total dumbass. F: Evil mastermind!!
41) What's the deal with America?
A: America is the greatest, and will always be. Nuff said. B: America stands for some great things, it's just our damn policies that piss me off. C: Man, I wish I lived in Europe or Canada or something...
42) Do you believe you will see the end of America as the the lone superpower in your lifetime? 43) So what's the deal with this site?
A: More content! More updates! Weh weh weh!! B: I think it's just fine. C: It's kinda amusing, I guess. D: I think you try too hard Ed.
44) Can you sing? 45) Can you play an instrument? 46) Can you juggle? 47) Have you ever killed a mammal? 48) Roadkill doesn't count. 49) Neither do mice traps. 50) Or hunting for that matter. 51) Did you know I sometimes photoshop the pictures to make them look better? 52) Could you format your own computer? 53) Do you floss at least once a day? 54) Are you a beer snob? 55) Are you a music snob? 56) Aren't we all music snobs? 57) Are you one of those people that talks to your friends on the phone at freaking 9am? A: Never B: Sometimes, but rarely C: Like, all the time
58) How about at like noon? Fucking Christ. A: Never B: Sometimes, but rarely C: Like, all the time
59) Speaking of which, how about that guy? A: I don't have a freaking clue. B: Those that don't follow Him will be condemned to Hell for all of eternity. C: He is the son of God, and we should follow his teachings. D: He existed, but was just a good guy. None of this son of god nonsense. E: He never existed
60) What about his dad? A: I don't have a freaking clue. B: There is a God, and He created man in his likeness. Oh and evolution is nothing but liberal propaganda. C: There is a God, and He wrote the bible, or something like that. D: There is some sort of creator or something, but none of that bible writing nonsense. E: There is no god or creator of any sort, and organized religion was created to keep the masses in line.
61) Would you permanently change your name to "Poo McSlapmychest" for $10 million? 62) What about "Frank Franklin"? 63) What about "Slut McFuckInMyTruck" 64) What if it was $2 million? 65) Would you rather be a master chef or a master breakdancer? 66) Would you rather have a flying carpet that can't be destroyed and you can never lose and can go up to the speed of sound, BUT you lose your legs, or every one of Darth Vader's powers? 67) Would you rather your legs twice as long, or your forearms? 68) Did you ever read the daily comics as a kid? 69) Are you considered athletic? 70) Do you typically pull the tags out of your t-shirts? 71) When you do though, are you always careful to not tear the fabric? 72) What is more important, career success or personal satisfaction? 73) Could you properly explain what a 'pun' is? 74) Could you properly explain why this joke is funny? 75) Ok, done.
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