The Ultimate Personality Quiz

Please answer every question truthfully. There are no wrong answers.

Except question 74.

1) Sex:
Male
Female

2) Do you close the bathroom door if you are alone in a house?
Yes
No

3) How about if you are not alone?
Yes
No

4) Do you stand or lean to one side when you wipe?
Stand
Lean

5) Do you mentally remember everything your hands have touched since you last washed them?
Yes
No

6) Have you ever been arrested?
Yes
No

7) Could you be in jail right now for the illegal things you've done?
Yes
No

8) The figure below that I like least is:





9) Presented with and I like the following the most:








10) Does the phrase "And now for something completely different." mean anything to you?
Yes
No

11) How about the phrase "Apes are monkeys too"
Yes
No

12) Or "..Making your dreams come true, for you. Making your dreams come true"
Yes
No

13) Have you ever been the first to show up to a party?
Yes
No

14) How about the last to leave?
Yes
No

15) Do you golf?
Yes
No

16) Do you disc golf?
Yes
No

17) Have you ever given blood?
Yes
No

18) Are you an organ donor?
Yes
No

19) Would you consider donating your body to science?
Yes
No

20) Are you a vegetarian?
Yes
No

21) Are you a vegan?
Yes
No

22) Have you ever tried being either?
Yes
No

23) Do you download music illegally?
Yes
I used to..
No

24) Do you download applications illegally?
Yes
No

25) Are you currently downloading anything illegally?
Yes
No

26) Have you ever shoplifted?
Yes
No

27) How about anything over like 10$?
Yes
No

28) Would you spank your child?
Yes
No

29) Would you shake them?
Yes
No

30) What is worse: being labeled as liberal or conservative?
Liberal
Conservative

31) Would you vote for Arnold if given the chance?
Affirmative
Negative

32) Did you vote in 04?
Yes
No
I would've if I could've

33) Do you know what the term "Political Flamewar" means?
Yes
No

34) Do you watch TV news?
Yes
Ha! No.

35) Do you watch MTV?
Yes
No

36) Do you pretty much gag at anything on TV?
Yes
No

37) How about Iron Chef?
Yeah I do love that show
Nope...

38) Do you remember when you learned the truth about Santa?
Yes
No

39) Have you ever been the one that told anyone the truth about Santa?
Mwhahaha!! Yes!
No

40) So what's the deal with Bush?
Evil mastermind!!
I think he's just a total dumbass.
He thinks what he is doing is good for this country, really he does. Still a dumbass.
I don't totally agree with him, but he sure as hell is better than anyone the Democrats have coughed out.
He is one of our greatest presidents ever.
God appointed him.

41) What's the deal with America?
Man, I wish I lived in Europe or Canada or something...
America stands for some great things, it's just our damn policies that piss me off.
America is the greatest, and will always be. Nuff said.

42) Do you believe you will see the end of America as the the lone superpower in your lifetime?
Yes
No

43) So what's the deal with this site?
I think you try too hard Ed.
It's kinda amusing, I guess.
I think it's just fine.
More content! More updates! Weh weh weh!!

44) Can you sing?
Yes
No

45) Can you play an instrument?
Yes
I used to...
No

46) Can you juggle?
Yes
No

47) Have you ever killed a mammal?
Yes
No

48) Roadkill doesn't count.
Still have
No

49) Neither do mice traps.
Yep
No

50) Or hunting for that matter.
...blood...
No

51) Did you know I sometimes photoshop the pictures to make them look better?
Yeah I kinda assumed
What? Photoshop?

52) Could you format your own computer?
Yes
No

53) Do you floss at least once a day?
Yes
No

54) Are you a beer snob?
Yes
No

55) Are you a music snob?
Yes
No

56) Aren't we all music snobs?
yeah, I guess so...
yeah, I guess so...

57) Are you one of those people that talks to your friends on the phone at freaking 9am?
Like, all the time
Sometimes, but rarely
Never

58) How about at like noon? Fucking Christ.
Like, all the time
Sometimes, but rarely
Never

59) Speaking of which, how about that guy?
He never existed
He existed, but was just a good guy. None of this son of god nonsense.
He is the son of God, and we should follow his teachings.
Those that don't follow Him will be condemned to Hell for all of eternity.
I don't have a freaking clue.

60) What about his dad?
There is no god or creator of any sort, and organized religion was created to keep the masses in line.
There is some sort of creator or something, but none of that bible writing nonsense.
There is a God, and He wrote the bible, or something like that.
There is a God, and He created man in his likeness. Oh and evolution is nothing but liberal propaganda.
I don't have a freaking clue.

61) Would you permanently change your name to "Poo McSlapmychest" for $10 million?
Yes
No

62) What about "Frank Franklin"?
Yes
No

63) What about "Slut McFuckInMyTruck"
Yes
No

64) What if it was $2 million?
Yes
No

65) Would you rather be a master chef or a master breakdancer?
Chef
Breakdancer

66) Would you rather have a flying carpet that can't be destroyed and you can never lose and can go up to the speed of sound, BUT you lose your legs, or every one of Darth Vader's powers?
The flying carpet
The powers

67) Would you rather your legs twice as long, or your forearms?
Legs
Forearms

68) Did you ever read the daily comics as a kid?
Yes
No

69) Are you considered athletic?
Yes
No

70) Do you typically pull the tags out of your t-shirts?
Yes
No

71) When you do though, are you always careful to not tear the fabric?
Yes
No

72) What is more important, career success or personal satisfaction?
Career success
Personal satisfaction
The two are one and the same

73) Could you properly explain what a 'pun' is?
Yes
No

74) Could you properly explain how this joke is supposed to be funny?

Yes
No

75) Ok, done.
Wait, please more!
Thank the freaking lord.


Forget it.